Friday 22 June 2012

Ultimate Spiderman TAS mini RANT

[The look on parkers face sums it up well]

ok. after listening to the latest ComicBookCast episode (they're awesome go listen!) I decided to check out the new Ultimate Spidey cartoon. They seemed to not like it and i thought i give it a go.

Oh My GOD is this bad. its like someone at marvel watched a bunch of scrubs episodes and thought "DERP i know i'll put in a bunch of random clips for no reason and add a load of cartoony sound effects, what can go wrong?"  well i'll tell you the sound fx are annoying the villians are made to look like idiots and spidey spends all the time talking more bollocks than he should do.

AND IM ONLY WATCHING THE FIRST FUCKING EPISODE!

He's breaking the fourth wall all the side characters are wrong, since when did mj want to be a reporter? Arnt May isnt nearly as doding as she is in the comics (ultimate or otherwise), Even Osborne is wrong, he's more caring than he should be.

The only thing i liked about the episode was Stan Lee's cameo as the janitor.

So yeah thats it. thought it sucked. it is Scrubs meets spiderman. and not in a good way.

Laters


Ph and if i hear him bang on about being "ULTIMATE" again i might have to break something.

Tuesday 19 June 2012

Chronix Comics - Marvel 2099 part 2 Spiderman 2099


30 years after amazing fantasy 15 hit the shelves Marvel released the first in their futuristic line, Spiderman 2099!

Writen by the great Peter David and drawn by the equaly great Ric Leonardi Spiderman 2099 if by far my favorite of the 2099 line. Lasting only 44 issues it still managed to make a huge impact on the marvel universe.


Spiderman 2099 (or the S-Man as he is more commonly known about the streets of down town) is really Miguel O'Hara, a genetisist working for Alchemax, one of the biggest corperations in the world. Miguel was working on a project to create the ultimate industrial spy by altering the DNA of someone to give them special abilities. He decided to give the subject the powers of Spiderman feeling that someone with his abilities would make an ideal spy for Alchemax.

For some time Miguel had been questioning the ethics of Alchemax and after witnessing his work being tested on a human which resulted in said subject mutating and eventually dying.

[Quick sombody call Jeff Goldblum!]

This was the last straw and he went off to confront Alchemax CEO Tyler Stone.

Tyler is your typical CEO "villan" like Looten Plunder from Captain Planet.

Anyway, Miguel storms into Tyler's office to have it out. He just walks into proberbly the most powerful man in the city's office and tells him where to stick his job. And Tyler is calm as a cucumber so you know somthing bad is going to happen.

[I told you before Tyler Im not sleeping with you!]

Tyler then tells Mike (He always calls Miguel "Mike" which he hates!) that he is sorry to see him go but he will always have a home at Alchemax. Then he proceeds to tell him that he had spiked Miguel's drink with an encredibly addictive street drug called Rapture.  A drug which only Alchemax can help kick. Miguel is pissed. He cant believe what Tyler had done and then goes home knowing that he will forever be in his clutches.

Its here we are introduced to Lyla, Miguel's Hologram A.I. She looks and sounds like Marilyn Monroe thanks to his old childhood friend Xina (She plays a big role later in the comics but I'm just focusing on the origin for today.) Also Dana , Miguels girlfriend is there waiting for him to return whilst going throu some exersice program with Lyla.

[Lyla - like jarvis, but with boobs]

Miguel comes storming in already feeling the effects of the drug. Dana is worried and goes to comfort him. Miguel is in a right state and lashes out accidently punching Dana. He tells her what happend and she says that he is a smart man and can fix this some how. (Remember that big machine at the begining that just Screamed "plot device"?)

[Dammit I am a Scientist!]

Miguel's brain clicks into gear and he heads back to work. Using the old excuse of burning the midnight oil he makes his way to his lab. He decides to use the machine to re-write his own DNA to that of before the drug was in his system (they did the same thing on Star Trek loads of times).

Unfortunatly Miguel is spotted by his douche of an assistant Aaron Delgado who catches miguel already in the machine. Aaron does a little reprogramming in a bid to turn Miguel into the same blob we saw earlier and activates the Spiderman program. Unfortunatly for Arron the machine goes haywire and explodes taking half the floor with it and changing Miguell forever.

[Bleh Bleh!]

Miguel steps from the machine not realising what has happend. Aaron is hanging for dear life over the edge. Without thinking Miguel leaps over to help him. what Miguel didnt know was that the machine had worked and had given him spider-powers, in the form of talons that stick out from his fingers and toes. In his attempt to save Aaron Miguel in fact digs his talons into Arron's arms and he falls to his death. Scared and with the PublicEye on its way Miguel runs. As if my instint Miguel learns that he can climb walls and shoot organic webbing out his wrists. He crashes into a Thorite Glider who believes him to BE Spiderman a Harbringer of Thor. The Thorite gives Miguel the scraps of his glider to cover himself, the material is spceial in that it helps people ride the updrafts and thus makes a perfect glider. Eventualy Miguel makes it home, all is quiet. He goes to get some clothes but unfortunatly his talons keep ripping his stuff. So he goes for the only thing in the house made of Unstable Molecule Fibre, an old Day of the Dead festival costume with a skull/spider logo on the chest. 

[This old thing? I've had it years!]

Miguel then spends the next few days avoiding everybode till the heats died down. He decides the best course is to just go to Alchamax and see whats what. Tyler is waiting for him. He explains that the security cameras went down after the explosion and that since Aaron's body wasn't found that HE must be spiderman. So Miguel is off the hook (for now...!) He makes Tyler believe that he is taking the cure for Rapture while secretly he is working to take down Alchemax and becomes the Hero of Downtown as Spiderman 2099!


I Love this comic. What i like about it is how differant he is to Parker. Peter was in his teens when he got bit and had to struggle with high school. Here Miguel is in his mid to late 20's and not only that has a job as a genetisist! Peter had to go though the whole uncle Ben death 50 year guilt trip we all know and love. Miguel doesnt. Sure thoughout the run he does learn that with Great power comes great responsibilty but its through overcoming his obstacles. Parker is the witty sometimes annoying loudmouth every villian wants to punch. Miguel is the strong silent type.

His powers are differant, the talons were are great idea as was the organic webbing. Miguel doesnt have a spider sense, instead he has Hyper-vision and can see for miles. This however has the unfortuante side effect of making him sensitive to light so he has to wear tinted lenses, i feel that adds a nice touch, not all his powers are perfect, he has to consentrate to keep his talons in check.

The artwork is great, Ric Leonardi does a fantastic job in depicting the sheare vastness of the city, the bright colours of the upper city and the darkness of down town. Peter David's writing throughout the series to this day makes me wish it was still going.

I highly reccommend this to any fan of cyber-punk, spiderman, peter david, anyone you know what just buy it.

Next time we travel to eastern Europe for a little bit of:



Friday 15 June 2012

Yet another update thing.

Ok. No videos or reviews. Sorry. For those of you who follow me, be it on YouTube or Twitter (hello to the both of you) may remember that I have now reconciled with my wife. Well we are now living together and I am now spending most of my spare time being a father. My work has also improved. I am now a chef. A completely un qualified chef but a chef none the less. I am also going to college to get said qualifications so that will be fun.

Basicly what im trying to say is if I can post I will but I am really starting to get my life back on track and that is the main priority for me atm.

Thanks.